Bangsa Ber-Pancawarna


In Australia whenever I met someone new who is a fellow SE Asian, or even from the Far East, and reveal myself as a Malaysian, he/she would invariably exclaim in delightful admiration: “Oh, you guys can speak several languages!

Though I’d smile, and not without some considerable pride at our Boleh-ness, perhaps the one sole qualification worthy of being proud about, I would at the same time quietly cringe at our notorious mastery of colourful profanities in at least half a dozen or more languages/dialects, way way before I came to know of some bloggers and blog visitors, wakakaka.

So as a nationality, we are if anything quite colourful, not least in the manner in which we love to generously lace our speeches with those multi-lingual and grossly obscene profanities and vulgarisms. Mind, we’d spew out our favourite lubricities, not merely as insults (though there have been lots of these), but as everyday usage in adjectives, adverbs and nouns in our conversations, and of course we would argue, only to emphasize and/or enhance the points we want to make.

Sometimes we even aver that in using the most colourful ‘F’ word, we had meant it in a complimentary way, like “God, she’s absoluetly f* beautiful” or in exasperated exclamations at our own predicaments or mistakes, like “Oh, now I’m truly f*”. Such is the versatility of the ‘F’ word that I need at least a whole post to demonstrate its wide ranging use, so I’ll stop its discussion here, reluctantly if I may confess.

In this, I wonder whether we are a wee like Australians who call their enemies ‘bastards’ but their closest friends ‘bloody bastards’.

But in further discussing the colourful nature of we Malaysians, I suppose we could perhaps start off with one of the tripods of our brand of democracy, namely, the judiciary.

The wonderfully remarkable Bench had demonstrated how they could turn black into white one day, and then white into black in another, as I had posted on 08 March 2010 in Federal Court ruling – black yesterday, white today.

Then I had written about the court declaring that Anwar’s dismissal as DPM [by then PM Dr M] is lawful because according to our marvellous judiciary, the king, as a constitutional monarch, was required to act in accordance with the advice of the prime minister.

* above underlining and bolding/highlighting by kaytee

… while a mere month prior to this (yes, just around 30 days), the very same three judges who were also on the appeals bench to hear Mohd Nizar Jamaluddin’s appeal against the unconstitutional sacking of him as the MB of Perak and the associated appointment of Zambry Abd Kadir as the new MB by the Sultan of Perak, ruled that it was not necessary for a vote of confidence to be done in the state assembly as the Sultan can conduct his own inquiry to determine which party or coalition has the majority.

In other words HRH was NOT required to act in accordance with the advice of the menteri besar at that time, namely Nizar.

Yessirree, these three same judges – just as a reminder that they, together with two other, had just one month earlier, ruled the Sultan of Perak, even as a constitutional monarch, could ignore the advice of MB Nizar to dissolve the Perak Assembly – told us in a case of Anwar Ibrahim versus Dr M, that the Agong, as a constitutional monarch, was required to act in accordance with the advice of the prime minister (Dr M).

Either they were of a most forgetful nature (and to f* with stare decisis) or we could quote George Orwell who wrote in Animal Farm (Chapter 2, pg 11), that “Squealer could turn black into white” wakakaka. Now, didn’t/doesn’t that just confirm our affinity with colours and thus, our colourful nature?

Well, what next? Oh yes, there’s those Yellow Perils, our most feared fifth columnists, the local Chinese, who had often been accused of being red, wakakaka. Got it, yellow = red? wakakaka!

Of course I mustn’t let Pantai Remis assemblyman Nga Kor Ming get away with his disgraceful ‘metallic black person’ remark. But he had apologized though he bloody well watches his mouth.

I won’t go into the seditious BTN indoctrinations, the terrible Johor headmistress or the Interlok insults which raised our temperature to the upper red mark of the thermometer as these shameful black-marked issues have already been battered blue black in the various coverages on them. Nor would I mention those men in blue who should be wearing black arm bands for their questionable conduct and behaviour.

But in closing I should talk a bit about the red, green and white of ang pows, which incidentally translate into ‘red packets’ (red for luck, as it is an auspicious colour). Yup, we’re now on the topic of Ibrahim Ali’s peh-pow (white packets) which he doled out to his MCA-marshalled Chinese visitors during Perkasa Chinese New Year Open House.