How do I love thee, let me count the ways (UPDATED with Chinese Translation)

I wrote some years back that I will have ‘arrived’ when both sides of the political divide hate me. I also wrote that I am not running a popularity contest and really don’t care whether the ‘Raja Petra Fan Club’ exists or not. Well, the good news is, the Raja Petra Fan Club has now officially closed.


Raja Petra Kamarudin

It’s been an interesting start to a new year, at least for some of us. Anyway, they did say that 2012 is supposed to be a year of turmoil; a year of change; maybe even the year the world, as we know it, will end…if what the Mayan calendar says is correct.

Whether you realise it or not, the Malaysian Civil Liberties Movement (MCLM) is now ‘high profile’, even if for the wrong reasons. But is not right and wrong relative? To some, putting apostates to death is right while to others it is wrong. So, certainly right and wrong is relative, relative to your value system.

Okay, so we have a situation here. But is it a hopeless situation, or is it a situation that can be simply solved with a stroke of the pen?

Let’s use this analogy. A bee has stung a man’s prick and his prick is swollen and he is in pain. He goes to the doctor and asks the doctor to remove the pain but not the size.

MCLM has been stung by a bee and is swollen and in pain. So, let’s just remove the pain without disturbing the size. And in this case the pain is me: Raja Petra Kamarudin. So, just remove Raja Petra Kamarudin and the pain will go away.

And this is what I am telling the MCLM committee and the founding members. Just remove me and allow MCLM to go on with its mission and vision. The agenda need not change. Only the head needs to change. After all, I can’t return to Malaysia to lead MCLM anyway and the present committee is a mere protem committee, not legally elected in the AGM, which is yet to be held and must be held very soon by law.

Is this so difficult to do? MCLM is about the cause. The cause is above the person. People come and go. But the cause must remain.

One reason Pakatan Rakyat refuses to engage MCLM is because of the ‘Independent Candidate Initiative’. Pakatan Rakyat is not prepared to give way to independent candidates. If independent candidates come in then we are going to see three- or even four-corner contests.

I know many of you were foaming at the mouth for exactly this point. You accused MCLM of serving Barisan Nasional’s agenda, of being a Trojan horse, for being guilty of triggering multi-corner contests and hence denying Pakatan Rakyat the possibility of winning the next general election.

Over and over I wrote in Malaysia Today that this is not true. MCLM is committed to a two-party system and in seeing the emergence of a strong opposition and is not attempting to grab votes away from Pakatan Rakyat by fielding a third candidate. But this assurance is not accepted. The only way everyone can be assured would be if MCLM is closed down and the independent candidates abandon their plan of contesting the election.

Well, the independent candidates have now announced they are withdrawing. In fact, they are severing ties with MCLM altogether. Only one still insists on contesting and even then he has said he would like to contest under a Pakatan Rakyat ticket.

Is this not what you wanted all along?

But when I say this, again and again, in Malaysia Today, the explanation is not accepted and the allegations of MCLM being a spoiler continues.

I try to talk to the ‘alternative’ media but am told by friends in Pakatan Rakyat that the order given was: do not engage MCLM and do not give them any space. In short, boycott MCLM and black out all news on MCLM.

Okay, you don’t believe what I say in Malaysia Today. The alternative media blacks me out. So I say it in the mainstream media. And I said very clearly that MCLM is NOT contesting the general election and we are NOT fielding candidates and in fact NEVER intended to contest the elections in the first place because we are NOT a political party.

It seems that is also the wrong thing to say. So what do you want me to say — that we WILL contest the general election and WILL engage in three-corner contests or that we will NOT contest the general election and WILL support a two-party system?

It appears like many of you are confused about what you want.

I wrote some years back that I will have ‘arrived’ when both sides of the political divide hate me. I also wrote that I am not running a popularity contest and really don’t care whether the ‘Raja Petra Fan Club’ exists or not. Well, the good news is, the Raja Petra Fan Club has now officially closed.

The Umno Blogs say that Malaysia Today is being financed by Anwar Ibrahim and that Raja Petra is a Pakatan Rakyat stooge. That is the spin in the Umno blogs. I deny it profusely and still the allegations continue.

Okay, what are the Umno Blogs going to say now? Now the Pakatan Rakyat Blogs are saying that Najib Tun Razak is financing Malaysia Today and that Raja Petra is an Umno stooge.

I must be the smartest Blogger in the world if I can get BOTH Anwar and Najib to finance Malaysia Today. Maybe I should instead be the Prime Minister or Opposition Leader if I am capable of this.

So, whose boy am I, Anwar’s or Najib’s? Yes, I know, those posting comments below are going to still insist I am Najib’s boy while the Umno Blogs are still going to insist I am Anwar’s boy.

It’s simple, really. There are no two ways about it. You have to be either Anwar’s boy or Najib’s boy. It MUST be one or the other. You cannot be no one’s boy. That is not allowed.

I suppose that is the same with religion and race. Either you are a Muslim or you are a non-Muslim. There are only two categories. You are also either Bumiputera or non-Bumiputera — again, only two categories.

Is the world just either black or white? Must it be only black and white? Isn’t there more than just black and white in this world? And must it either be Anwar’s boy or Najib’s boy?

Could I possibly be Muhyiddin Yassin’s boy? Could I not also be Mat Sabu’s boy? Can’t I be Ronnie Liu’s boy? Or Datuk Kamarul Baharin’s boy, maybe? Is it not possible I am no one’s boy? Is there absolutely no likelihood that I dislike ALL politicians, both sides of the political divide?

I remember back in the 1970s when I had an argument with Dr Zakaria Salim and Encik Ibrahim (the head of ITM Dungun) during a function in the Sultan of Terengganu’s palace. They were both, of course, hardcore Umno men. The argument was about politics and politicians.

Halfway through the ‘debate’, I shocked everyone when I shouted: to me, all politicians should be lined up against the wall and shot with a bullet in the head. All politicians are leeches and slimeballs. We need a people’s revolution so that we can kill all the politicians.

There was a stunned silence as I walked off.

What makes you think my views from the 1970s have changed? I idolised Che Guevara back then and still do now. And I have stated time and time again that I want to be a Che Guevara and not a Castro — and if you don’t understand what that means then blame Malaysia’s education system.

I am not contesting the elections so I don’t need your votes. I know I am called ‘hero to zero’. You called me that back in April last year. I thought I was already a zero last year? How can I now, again, be a ‘hero to zero’ when I am already a zero? Make up your mind.

As my final word, Faekah Husin, the MB’s political secretary, has challenged me to produce the evidence of corruption or wrongdoing in Selangor. Be careful what you wish for. If you want me to do that I can do just that. Just make sure you don’t, again, start foaming at the mouth when I do.

Let me close with this short story.

A husband and wife were celebrating their 50th wedding anniversary over a candlelight dinner when a fairy godmother suddenly popped up and asked them what they would like to wish as a present for their wedding anniversary.

The wife said she had never been on a world cruise and wishes for that and, poof, the fairy godmother made two cruise tickets appear.

The husband said he wishes his wife can be thirty years younger than him and, poof, the fairy godmother turned him into a 99-year old man.

Yes, be careful what you wish for because Raja Petra Kamarudin is known to grant wishes.

Translated into Chinese at: