Torn Between Two Lovers

What’s so important that Zaid Ibrahim has left Pakatan? What’s so important that some greedy frogs have jumped ship? What’s so important about Pakatan losing a few by-elections? What’s so important if Pakatan lost Perak after winning? What’s so important if we build the tallest building in the world? What’s so important if Anwar is sent to jail for putting his tool in the wrong place? Which of course is bullshit. Ask yourself. Does it make BN any better? Maybe I should put it this way…If Malaysia were the United States, or France, or Australia, or New Zealand, or England, or Japan, or Taiwan, or Singapore, or Korea, or Canada, or Germany, BN would be out of the job long ago. Only countries like Zimbabwe will employ BN.

The momentum is picking up. Soon, the people will meet each other face to face at the polling stations. Reading the thousands of conflicting views among bloggers and commenters, what’s on TV and radio, what’s in the MSM and cyberspace, it can be quite scary and confusing to many. It’s almost like your parents have already booked your wedding dinner function and you must marry by June next year. But the problem is; you can’t decide which lover to marry because there are TWO. Well, to help you decide, let’s say we forget about all the shouting, the cursing, the fighting, the whining, the sweet-talking and break for a moment to do a tiny bit of reality check…

08 March 2008 was the defining moment. Two years on and we’ll soon be standing in front of the ballot box to choose the next government. For good or for bad, the chosen one will be our social, political and economic guardian for another 5 years or less. So, make yourself a cup of coffee while we review some of the important issues and hard statistics currently on the table.

Transparent International’s Corruption Perception Index (CPI)

Wow, this is a big one. The CPI refers to the political and economic risks if one were to invest in a country. The better the ranking, the safer it is to put your life and money there. In other words, if a country is ranked at Number 1, then you can leave the front door open and put your life-savings on the dinner table and go to sleep peacefully. If you are ranked last, then you better sleep inside an armored vehicle.

In 2004, Malaysia was ranked 39. In 2007, it was 50. So maybe, this made the people angry in 2008. This year, 2010, we are ranked 56. So, should we celebrate or should we be angrier? Hello? If I were you, I’ll lock the front door and start looking for a safe to keep my cash. Goodnight!

This has got to change and Pakatan WILL FIX IT!!

Universities Ranking (THE-QS)

Another big one. The Times Higher Education Index is quite an authoritative agency that determines which universities are good and which are idiot dump sites. Every year, they list the Top 200. Any rankings outside that 200 is not a beautiful sight and is really meant for parents to curse and swear at. There are about 195 countries in the world today and if each country has at least ONE good university, then everyone would be in the list; happy and smiling even if your country ranks last. So, I think the Top 200 is a fair distribution.

And where does Malaysia stand? Don’t laugh brother, but all these years Malaysia has been standing outside the 200 LOOKING ONLY praying hard that God will one day be kind enough to put us inside among the 200! Are Malaysians really THAT stupid? I don’t think so. The smart ones are NOT studying in our own universities but gone elsewhere to study because our education system STINKS! That’s why!! Yeah, pray hard brother. Unless we’re happy to remain idiots, we’ll NEVER get there because BN’s EDUCATION POLICIES WILL MAKE SURE WE DON’T GET THERE.

This has got to change and Pakatan WILL FIX IT!!

Human Development Index (HDI)

There is such a thing called HDI. It is developed by the United Nations in 1990 and is used to measure a country’s “well-being” such as the degree of life expectancy, literacy, education, and standards of living of countries around the world. And that measurement classifies if a country is already “developed”, “developing”, or God forbid, “underdeveloped” – the house where Mr. Poverty lives.

Ever since the index was created, Malaysia has been quietly sitting inside the “developing country” box. Right now we’re at Number 57. Singapore? Oh, you can use bad words, but unfortunately, they’re way ahead of us at Number 27, happily sipping Veuve Clicquot champagne and eating Beluga caviar among the “developed” countries. To make it into their league, we’ll have to kick out Barbados who is sitting quietly in a corner munching celery sticks dipped in blue cheese. At Number 42, Barbados is the last of the “developed” bastards.

2020 is so far away. Well, at least that was what Mahathir thought when he said we’ll be “developed” by then. Well, the years sure have slipped by Mr. Toon. For the past 20 years you have been busy digging our graves and now Najib is dialing the coffin maker and Moo is learning to sing “Amazing Grace”. We ain’t getting nowhere Mr. Toon because we’re still STUCK IN THE MUD BECAUSE OF YOU AND BN’S POLICIES!! Those guys inside the “developing countries” box will still be playing lah-lah-li-la-toong-poom with us in 2025! No, we don’t want to join Zimbabwe for two reasons. One, they’re the last in the class, and two, we can’t speak Shona nor Ndelele.

This has got to change and Pakatan WILL FIX IT!!!

Foreign Direct Investments (FDI)

You know this one, but let’s talk about it anyways because THIS is the MOTHER of the big ones as it really affects our pockets and it ties in with our CPI ranking earlier. Let’s not waste our time and look too far back. We’ll start off from 2006 and look at the “before and after” effects of the 2008 Global Financial Crisis triggered by the two idiot brothers in the US.

In 2006, USD6.0 billion of fresh fragrant smelling foreign capital flowed in. In 2007, an even BIGGER amount got conned into our economy – USD8.5 billion. In 2008, when Badawi’s pants were on fire, it went down to USD7.3 billion. I suppose we can blame it on the two brothers. Last year, Messrs. Najib, BN & Partners Sdn Bhd went all over the world looking for investors and came back with just enough to feed our cats – USD1.3 billion. And not only that – our OWN people are taking their money and leaving. Last year, while at the airport, Najib, BN & Partners must have met Messrs. Malaysian & Company at the departure lounge carrying USD8.0 billion in their suitcases!!! No one wants to invest in Malaysia. NOT EVEN OUR OWN PEOPLE! We are on our own buddy…REALLY on our own. “We” meaning those that even pickpockets will regret going after.